welcome/introduction

Mom has made several offhanded comments about writing a book. I have set up this so that she has a place to write. I figure she's probably got something to say worth reading; if not, it'll save us from having to buy the book.

I have enabled comments. I'm sure she would be pleased with positive feedback. (Rude, mean, or unacceptable comments will not be tolerated.) Good luck, mom.

Email Post 7

After going to a doctor here in Wilson, NC,and having a "supposedly benign tumor" removed, the pathology report showed I had an aggressive form ofbreast cancer. Then I went to a breast cancer specialist at Duke Univ. Hospital.

He ran a number of tests and from the CT scan I learned I also have two tumors in my liver. The biopsy came back Wednesday which said that they were cancerous also, but the primary source was from the breast. A medical oncologist is now directing my case who is waiting for the remaining tests to come back to let him know exactly what I have. One test showed what they had suspected, that I have a HER 2 marker. I have begun to research this, but to be honest it is a little hard to take it all in so I don't really have enough information to give you to speak about this intelligently.

I have finished 2 of the 3 years for my Masters of Divinity. I never was sure why the Lord wanted me to go to seminary, except that He told me to go. Many people ask me what I am going to be when I grow up. Last year I felt like the Lord gave me an answer to that question; I'm going to be ready. I didn't know what I was going to be ready for, but I was content to know that whatever it was I would be ready. So now I am wondering if this is what He was getting me ready for. I don't have medical knowledge, but I do have a deeper knowledge of God and His perfect ways.

So now I am waiting for the next step and trusting God that He is in control. Thank you so much for praying and for requesting prayer for others to pray for me. It means so much to me! I am learning what it means to have the peace that passes understanding.

Love,

Karen

Email Post 6

I had a very busy weekend, also. The bottom line is that the CT scan showed tumors on my liver, so I went for a biopsy on Friday. I will hear the results on Mon. or Tues. hopefully. I have a doctor's appt. on Thursday.

God is in control and I am resting in Him. I took the news of the possible liver cancer hard at first, but I am ok with it now. If I have it, then ok let's get on with treating it. Yesterday a friend came over and told me she felt that the Lord wanted her to drive me to seminary next fall. I was overwhelmed by her kindness. She is a good friend and a graduate of the seminary. Today was a good day. I am feeling better from the biopsy today and have been encouraged by seeing people at church and a baseball game. Everyone it seems is praying for me. I feel so honored. There are so many other things in the world to pray for, I am humbled that God is hearing about me from people all over the world.

Gotta go now,

Love ya.

Karen

Email Post 5

It may take a while to tell the latest. The bottom line is there are 2 tumors in my liver. Today I had a liver biopsy, the results will be back on Monday or Tuesday. Since I may also have liver cancer, the mastectomy is postponed.

I'll talk to you soon. Thanks for your prayers.

Karen

Email Post 4

I am doing ok, although I must admit that today reality is setting in more than it did last week. I was attacking the problem, learning about cancer, going through tests such as bone scan, CT scans, chest X-rays and the like to see if there is any other cancer in my body and other proactive activities. This week I am primarily waiting, getting things in order at home, and preparing for the surgery. I think the later is harder mentally.

I sometimes have trouble writing because it forces me to articulate my feelings. Part of me doesn't want to do that because I don't want to recognize what I feel. Does any of this make since? Anyway, what I am trying to say is that I hope you understand if some days I don't write right back. I am doing all I can to keep my heart and mind on track. I am trying to take every thought captive and not let my mind go off the deep end. Usually I am very successful, and most people would tell you I am taking all this so well, but since you are close to my heart I can't pretend with you. I don't want you to get a dismal picture, and I am afraid you might from this email, but please don't. I am trusting this will work out for good. This experience will be used many times over and that I will always be thankful for it. But just because things are good, doesn't mean that they are easy or fun. I remember the day you all left for your new home and M said, "Mommy, I can't do this. It's too hard!" We all looked at her helplessly because we all had our hands full and couldn't help her and then you responded, "Well M, sometimes we have to do hard things." It was so profound. I will never forget it. I have been thinking about that a lot recently. Well, I already feel better. I got some of these things off my chest and I think it was therapeutic.

Well I have to go now. I am going to meet with the school principal about M's class schedule for the fall. I still can't believe he will be a Senior this year. Then I have to talk to my hair dresser about getting a wig and other related things in preparation for the chemo. Then M and I are going school shopping. He is worried that he won't have school clothes in time for the start of school if we don't do it before my surgery next Tues. He is probably right so we are going today. We have to leave soon.

I'll talk to you later,

Love ya lots,

Karen

Email Post 3

I just finished a battery of tests at Duke: chest X-ray, mammogram, CT scan, bone scan, blood tests. They took 2 days. I have seen the result of the mammogram already and it looks like I don't have any other lumps. The doctor told me to not get my hopes up because mammograms don't show if you have microscopic cancer cells, but at least we know there isn't anything obvious that we need to be concerned with.

The way things stand now I am scheduled for a mastectomy (left breast only) on Tuesday, July 20th. I haven't heard if they found any other cancer in my body, but I figure that if they did I will hear about it soon. So at this point no news is good news.

Love ya,

Karen

This is my friend, Mary, who went with me to Duke for my first appointment. We are in the waiting room discussing what I had just learned. Mary went through breast cancer last year.

Email Post 2

I wanted to let you know what the latest news with me is. I found out recently that I have breast cancer. I am going to go to Duke Univ. Hospital tomorrow to get a second opinion; I am very thankful that I could get an appointment this quickly.

I will write to you again later after I know more, but in the meantime I wanted to ask you to remember me in your prayers. The diagnosis was a real shock since I feel so healthy. But the fact that I am in otherwise good health is of course a blessing since I probably am looking at a mastectomy, chemo and who knows what else.

I will be leaving tomorrow morning about 7:30 a.m. Duke is a little over an hour away from our home. Dan and I are going to take a detour on the way to pick up a friend. She had breast cancer last year and wanted to go with me tomorrow. The fact that she wanted go with me to meet her doctor, show us how to get there, where to park, what building to go in etc. will be a nice gift. She will also be there to give me advice and to know what is normal and what is not. Anyway I just wanted to tell you this, hopefully the next email I write will be more positive. I am really at peace about the cancer, but I do have my moments when my emotions feel like they are on a rollercoaster.

It's getting late and I have to get ready for tomorrow,

I'll talk to you soon,

Karen